People and Their Empty Words

Why do people you run into after yonks think after the initial Ooo laa la “I haven’t seen you in ages”, “What have you been up to?” “Still working at the same place?” “How are the kids?” “Oh I can’t believe they are that grown up?”…..think the polite thing to do next is ask for your phone number (again) email (again) mobile number (again)

What is with people that say the stupidest things ever?  Times pass, kids grow and people age and move on. What is there to gush about?

I guess I can pardon this person I ran into the in this instance as all three details she requested from me have changed still she didn’t know that did she? And when one asks for mine, common decency dictates you to jot down theirs.

When I was naïve not necessarily young nevertheless naïve I used to make an effort to keep in touch while the gushing was still warm, I am just happy to utter empty words of ‘how long it had been’ and just move on without even asking for a phone number or even say we should catch up sometimes. I find it tedious to say things that I have no intention of following up with these ‘long lost pals, run into by chance.’  

After all that, I am the one to always write first and sometimes I might get a mail back or none at all. But hey I was not the one hyperventilating for the numbers and parted with the must get together diarrhoea.   I am always more than happy after chance meetings to move on with a “see you later”

This time, though I was given her contact details, I thought to myself, I didn’t ask, she did; let her make the first move.

So, now I am waiting!!!!

Power of Silence

I cleaned the dreaded room. I’ve asked her to do it from times too far to stretch my memory. The doors of her built-in were bursting, waiting to fall down. I pulled out all the stuff that were sitting on the floor of the robe and asked, very politely mind you, if she would mind sorting through the mound and discard anything that she does not have any use for anymore. She said “ok”

Next,   the whole pile was back inside the cupboard. That was one weekend not so long ago.

I thought enough was enough when a friend’s four year old daughter expressed shock at the state of the room.  With the child’s expression came the reinforcing factor I needed to do something about the room but had gotten accustomed to. What the culprit had to say when told the reaction of a four year old, was “how dare that little brat come into my room”

Yesterday I thought ‘I’ve had it’. I pulled the whole pile out again and sorted through it myself and discarded all she has grown out of or the things I thought she will have no use for and neatly arranged the rest.

I thought it was worth the long face I’d have to deal with and the music I’d have to face when the time came and she descended home

And you might say “serves you right, it’s her room and it’s her right”

And I’ll say “tough” It should resemble human habitat not a pig sty.

But guess what? To my absolute amazement I didn’t hear a peep out of her last evening except to find her bedroom door closed when she left this morning. As that was unusual when she is not inside, I opened to investigate the mystery behind. There was a chair barricading the wardrobe doors with a whole pile of stuff on it.

Her silent and powerful message was like the clank of gates being locked. Though silent, it was loud and clear. I was waiting for the “how dare you go through my stuff?” “Where is the privacy in this house?” ladi  ladi la, to clean the rest of her robe next free time I had.

Now in all honesty I can’t even fathom opening the doors to tidy except to put her clean clothes in.

I am still reeling from the impact of her tacit message.

I think my daughter is smarter and mature than I give her credit for!

Love – The Laughter and Tears That Goes With It

Meeting of two souls with reciprocal feelings of love for one another is a beautiful thing. There are no explanations for how or why we feel this way about certain people but when that happens, the rest of the world is at a standstill. We will exist, live and breathe, sunrise to sunset, day in and day out for one another. They will dominate our consciousness and consume our thoughts leaving a warm, beautiful feeling.

Though beautiful and happy, love can also be painful. Your love for someone makes you vulnerable leaving you susceptible to be deeply hurt by them. But does that mean we avoid love, no we don’t. Does that mean if someone has hurt us in the past we shun all other suitors? No! Should we wallow in our pain for evermore? No! We get over our hurt with the resilient nature us human have been bestowed upon and move on. We might carry a residual pain for years perhaps but move on we must.

If we so choose, we can wallow in pain and drown ourselves in misery and make life inconceivably sad not just for us but to others around us as well or we can make a conscious choice to gear our life to fulfilment.

From where I stand, and that is with some experience mind you, while I accept love that was not allowed to run its course will pain for a long time, your heart will heal one day. By that I mean one partner moving on while the other is still in love or the smitten pair fallen apart for other reasons whilst still in love. Unlike love that has just fizzled out for both, love that was not allowed to run its course and close its feelings, leave you heartbroken. And that is an unbearable feeling.

Still, I sincerely don’t believe that there is only one special someone for us all. There are quite a few we’ll bump into during the course of our journey through life. We don’t realise that while living in the moment and enjoying the present special someone with all his/her foibles and unaware of the future or after a breakup and wallowing in sadness for the lost love. But there are others waiting in the wings to cross our paths as this universe will allow and that is what keeps us kicking and reliving………..

There are many types of relationships….Some we connect on certain levels, some we connect on just one level (mostly physical) and some it is a meeting of the souls connecting on many levels bringing out the best in each other. These relationships are rare and if you are one of the lucky ones to enjoy such a union, latch onto your partner like a leech. Hang on a minute, no, not like a blood sucking leech, which will drive your partner away. Just hang onto them with love, respect, understanding and appreciation of what you have. These are the relationships we just feel comfortable being with even without uttering a word. Unfortunately not many of us meet this special someone in this lifetime.

If you have loved and lost, as painful as it may be, say a prayer of thanks for experiencing love at all. Some people live and die without ever experiencing what it is to be totally in love with another or be loved and to have experienced the beauty and magic of it all.

So if you cry for your lost love, wipe away the tears and look out the window, somewhere out in the horizon there is someone special waiting for you. All you have to do is walk with your eyes open and a heart waiting to receive and you will love again.

Love is wonderful, it makes the world go around but to think love is eternal is a misnomer. Like many things in this world, love too dies to be reborn again more beautiful and fuller with another. So enjoy everything life throws at you.

This post is for any lost souls out there who are hurting after a breakup and might feel there is no tomorrow. But there is always a tomorrow if only you allow your mind to perceive through your eyes, the beautiful rising sun and not just the beautiful sunset.

Wish you well and have trust in that you will love again!

Hope this helped in some small way for you to grow in strength and have a positive outlook.